Shouldn't people think before they speak about teens?

What do you think? I mean, when people think about teens, the first thing that comes to their mind is " O my goodness, I wouldn't want to be their mother/father". At least that's all I ever hear anyone say. Why dosen't anyone feel that the behavior of teens varies from person to person?


I am a teen, but I don't do the things that most teens do, I've never even had a boyfriend(which sucks, my own fault tho), but everyone that I meet up with always has something bad to say about me or about teens in general. How can I change that? I don't like the fact that I am a big sister to really little kids and I don't want these peoples opinions affecting how my siblings look at me. I don't want them to think I am an idiot or a hoodlum or something.


The only thing that I think that would make people think differently about me is my black eyeliner/black t-shirts. It's just who I am, is that what makes people hate teens so bad?

Shouldn't people think before they speak about teens?
i definitely know where you are coming from. i hate how parents always assume the worst in their teens. sometimes i think our parents went from like 4 to 40 over night and skipped their teen experience. yeah they were in the position we were in, but technology and everything has grown and expanded since they were young. so its really different and they're just trying to protect us from things. but yes i hate how people are stereotyped constantly every where and everyday. as my icon on AIM says BAN STEREOTYPES: "oh im punk, so i must cut my wrists." "i'm blonde, so i must be a ditz." "i'm oriental, so i can't drive." "i'm asian, so i must love math." "i'm overweight, so i must have no self control." things like that is what people say. and its a load of bull sh!t. parents and adults need to learn how to respect their teens, and understand where they are coming from. not just assume every freaking thing we do is horrible and something is going to wrong. i think we are old enough to know whats right and wrong, and if teens do make bad decisions let them, and let them learn from it. i think all teen voices need to be heard. its like we are just hear living, with no say in anything we do, because its like everything we do is horrible because our f u c k ing horomones. [as parents say] well you know what, its like just be f u c k ing happy that your daughter isnt a teenage mother, because obviously that tells you something that they know what they are doing. geesh. lets protest.
Reply:I completely sympathize with you. I have the exact same problem, and I'm a FIFTEEN-YEAR-OLD TEENAGER.





%26gt;I don't care about being popular or having a boyfriend. In fact I've never had a boyfriend and I never want to either. I just want close friends (both boys and girls) for my social life.





%26gt;I'm crazy about getting A's in all honors courses, and can't take anything lower than that.





%26gt;I never spend money unless the stuff I have don't function (clothes for example. I don't buy them unless they are at a really cheap price, mine are the wrong size, or they have holes in it).





%26gt;Pretty much, most people look at me and think that I'm so restrained and lonely, but the truth is that I find it exhilarating.





%26gt;There is no way I'll have sex in my life (unless I get married, which as of now I don't want to do). In fact, I look down on pregnant or "sex-having" teenagers.





%26gt;When I have conversations with fellow teenage girlfriends, we tend to talk about history and politics rather than gossip.





%26gt;We are branded as unpopular and geeky, BUT I DON'T CARE. I love the way my life is.





HOWEVER...


Most teenagers out there aren't like you and me. They form a higher percentage of the teenage population, so adults tend to see more of them than us. There isn't much we can do about it because most adults don't see "good" teenagers "in action". They only hear about them. This forms the prejudice they have against an age group: the adolescents.





ALSO...


Teenagers are in a transition period. They are not kids, but not adults. They try to behave like one of the other groups. When they behave like kids (make a mess), we call them immature. When they behave like adults (having sex), we still call them immature. What can they do? They are innocent people looking for attention.
Reply:The problem is yes there are alot of great teens out there who have good heads on thier shoulders and make the right choices in their lives. Unfortunatly the bad out number the good, you have idiotic teens out there who think about nothing but sex nd then they get themselves into adult situations and consequences they cant handle wether it be teenage pregnancy or STD's and even Aids, not to mention all the teens that are doing drugs and commiting crimes, I ask where are there parents and why arent they being good parents and educating their teens? Obviously you have good parents because you seem to be a good kid keep up the good work and always stay smart, you will be the one to go down the right path while your peers are strung out on drugs, in jail, or on welfare trying to raise a baby they had at 13 years old.
Reply:as the saying goes, one bad apple ruins the bunch. people like to generalize and what goes for one goes for all. continue to be an individual. continue to be yourself. as long as you behavior is not harming anyone or self destructive, keep on keeping on girl! dont worry what others do or say, the example you set for your siblings is what matters. they are little sponges and will want to emulate your actions. so continue to set the example. my kids are tattooed, pierced and are musicians. both have their own style of dress/hair/makeup. they are both straight A students. they look different. people make comments. rolls off them because THEY know what they are doing is good. hold your head high and be confident in your decisions.
Reply:Well good for you for being such a great young woman.





As for your question, well you answered it yourself when you said "I don't do the things most teens do" key word you used is MOST TEENS. so it sounds like you're saying that most teens are troublemakers.





See, the "good" teens (the ones who stay away from drugs and alcohol, and sex, and who go to school and study hard) they aren't as visible to adults (i mean we don't see them as often) because those teens don't have time to hang out at the mall shoplifting in their hoochie mamma outfits. They don't run the streets at all hours of the night vandalising our city parks and homes. We see so much of the troubled teens and so little of the un-troubled teens.





Your little siblings will not think of you as a hoodlum if they see you getting good grades, and being respectful to your parents and other adults.
Reply:I absolutely agree!! People are, of course, more interested in bad news and therefore hear more about the overall irresponsible behaviour of the "usual" teenager and in the end, get a seriously bad picture of us! And for me, all of this is maddening because I don't and never will drink, smoke, swear at ease or have any sexual experience whatsoever until marriage (or 18 at least) and I have a rather great relationship with my family, I work well at school, watch good movies and read good books, etc. I protect and take care of myself. Why do (most) people have to immediately get the picture of some recklessly brainless weirdo with a bad haircut and multiple piercings when they hear the word "teenager"? Do they think it's anymore mature to take youth as an insult or instantly generalize about someone for who they are? I don't. I think something's wrong with them if they do!





As for how you suggest or think people will think of you differently, I don't think you should rely on makeup and t-shirts of a certain color! Trust me, you can do better than that! I relied on a strong coat of makeup and too-tight-clothes-enough-to-show-my-woma... to appear older due to insecurity on how I was and how others perceived me, but then I realized it was all wrong and best to just be myself. "Myself" was the polite and kind side of me, if I do say so myself, so no harm in that AND I was finally being honest (and my age, finally). You have to give off good vibes-- you can show you're not just the average teen or a hoodlum, as you so finely said. ; )





Well, finally, thank you for asking this question-- I was really getting all bottled up in anger on this matter-- and it was nice to help someone else with the same thought. Or at least, I HOPE I helped you!! And good luck. You've got a good head on your shoulders and are sure to succeed in life. : )





P.S. Wait for boyfriends. Think that most of your life will probably be spent with someone else, so why not stretch the single life a bit further? Until you're really ready? ; )
Reply:hey I asked a question like this.I like having my own style and even if I get evil looks you just have to brush it off.Even though it makes me annoyed and angry they have no right to give evil looks.It's the media faults they make us all seem like druggies and stuff.
Reply:Unfortunately people often talk in general terms. The good kids do not get the publicity but the bad ones sure do. I have 3 grandsons who are teen agers and I am extremely proud of them and the parents who raise them. They are bright, loving, and good people. So I do not think all teens are a problem. Do not dwell on it. You know yourself so be proud of who you are. No doubt your siblings adore you and watch how you behave. That is all that matters.
Reply:yeah
Reply:Shouldn't YOU do the same as you seem to think adults should do? You've generalized the entire adult population. Since you could not possibly know every single adult on this planet there is no way you could know what goes on in their minds when they think about teens. So my advice to you little girl is "Practice what you preach"..."clean off your own doostep before you try telling someone else how to clean their's". "Wait until you walk on water before you claim to be perfect"